XMAS IS NOT CHRISTMAS

( click to find how to turn cash directly into a Christmas gift: Xmas_Cash . )

For the last fifty years I've been in business, its been 'givemegivemegiveme,moremoremore.' Tell you what, you little bastards, Santa doesn't have it to give anymore, its all gone... including my red suit.
Santa says: save a bundle on xmas, show the kids what really happened to Santa. (see pic.) That'll put an end to 'give me a skateboard, give me a Tickle Me Elmer, I got to have an Xbox or I'm going to die.' You're lucky I don't give them a good bout of cancer to go with their tooth decay. Fify years ago I liked kids, not any more -- the selfish, little attention deficit bastards... even if you nail one foot to the floor, they still run in circles. Of course they have to move fast, they have six hundred toys to play with, and in the morning they will have new toys. I've had it with Wal-Mart, Target, Cosco, and all the others who have convinced these kid's parents all this crap is needed.
What about the poor? Well, the poor get a bunch of crap nowadays too, except the poor have to have their names put on a tree or their pictures splashed in the paper so the rich can feel good about helping the poor. "See Margo, the poor are having a good Xmas too!"
Years ago the rich use to know the poor, but now since the rich have convinced themselves the poor are a bunch of drug-addict, thieving, stupiddirty people, the rich have circled the wagons in their gated neighborhoods, convincing each other that the poor might steal their stuff or bugger one of their brats. The rich only know the rich; the poor are a suburban myth to the rich. Well, Santa's had it: there will be no more xmas.
Yes, Virginia, there really is a Christmas, and no -- we don't know what happened to it.